


Little Godling at Camp Half-Blood

by Terrahsims



Series: Harry Potter and the Gods [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Dumbledore Bashing, Dursley Bashing, F/M, Loki (Marvel) is Harry Potter's Parent, Monsters, Odin bashing, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:33:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25860628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Terrahsims/pseuds/Terrahsims
Summary: Book 2 of The Littlest AsgardianHarry James Potter isn't just a wizard; he is also a God. Youngest son of Loki, God of Chaos and Mischief, aka James Potter.After having his father taken from him by Odin, the Goddess Frigga, aka Granny, takes matters into her own hands and passes the Godling Harald Loki Potter to her good friend Hera, Greek Goddess and Queen of Olympus, to raise.
Relationships: Hera/Zeus (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore)
Series: Harry Potter and the Gods [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1817944
Comments: 35
Kudos: 265





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: The Harry Potter story and characters do not belong to me but to the Goddess of Writing JK Rowlings. Loki and the Asgardians also do not belong to me but to Norse myths and legends, plus Marvel. Camp Half-Blood and characters belong to Rick Riordan and Greek myths and legends.
> 
> The bolded italic words are the words of Ms. Rowlings and/or Marvel Universe and/or Rick Riordan.
> 
> This is a fan-fiction, all changes and mistakes are mine.
> 
> ALSO, this story is mine and no one has permission to post this on any other site or claim it as their own.

The old man sat at his desk, sucking on his lemon candy while twirling a strand of his beard hair. The Squib he was "courting" sent him the daily newspaper for Little Whinging, Surrey. He had to keep track of the last Potter spawn after all. Taking a sip of his bourbon laced tea, he opens the newspaper and spits out his drink all over the paper. " _Local businessman brutally murdered in London carpark, leaving wife and child."_ He read to himself.

"FUCK!" the old man swore. " _Only one child was mentioned,"_ he thought. "FUCK!" he moaned, " _this means I gotta take Figgie on a date to see if she has more information on the brat!"_ The old man proceeded to bang his head on his desk, the portraits in his office whispering to each other.

\-----

_"My Lady." Nemesis came out of Remus's room, where she had been watching the Wild Hunt. "This mortal wants revenge on her husband. Revenge for bringing strife into their home. Revenger for attacking her sister's son. But mostly revenge for cheating with his secretary."_

_"Humm…" Hera said, tapping her pointer finger on her lips, "Nemesis, as Goddess of Revenge, I think you should help this mortal."_

_"However, that would leave me with two shieldmaidens and you only with one." Frigga joined in, "Sandraudiga, you will go with Nemesis and Petunia."_

_"Excellent choice, now we have equal numbers again," Hera said, clapping her hands._

_"My Lady? May Apollo and I see the baby now that he is sleeping, we want to run some diagnostics on him." Eir asked as she and Apollo came into the room from where they had been consulting in Harry's bedroom._

_"Oh, yes, you may," Frigga responded, handing Harry to Eir. "Sandra…" Frigga crooked her finger at the shieldmaiden and whispered to her. (_ Terrahsims, (2020). The Littlest Asgardian _, Archive of Our Own.)_

_"I need you to stay on Midgard and be Harald's bodyguard while he grows up. Odin will remove all our memories of the baby in a bid to hid him from us. Please teach him our language, culture, fighting style, everything a Prince of Asgard needs to know. He won't be alone forever. I have seen our reunion in the future. Go with Nemesis, so you are out of Odin's eye when he comes." Frigga whispered her instructions to Sandraudiga._

So, at this moment, Sandraudiga sat in a window seat in a room that the Greek Goddess Hera had set up to mimic baby Harald's suite of rooms on Midgard, which mimicked Prince Loki's suites on Asgard. The only difference was instead of one suite on the left for baby Harald and one suite on the right for Remus, there were now two suites on the right: one for Remus and the other for her. Sandraudiga hated it. Yes, her rooms here on Olympus were more beautiful than her small apartment in Asgard. Still, she hated her job, being a bodyguard to a toddler, " _yugh!"_ she thought, " _nothing worse than a toddler, noisy, smelly, little animals; always underfoot and never listens."_ At that moment, the toddler she was thinking about letting out an ear-piercing scream of delight as he was playing with the kitten that Frigga had gifted Harry with the tear of mourning that fell right before Odin attacked the royal family.

Harald wanted to know what the name of the cat was in Asgardian, instead of naming the cat a name…he called the cat, cat, or rather, Skogkatt. She couldn't believe that the baby was able to pronounce the word in Asgardian as well as he could mainly when Remus spoke only Midgardian English to him, it just went to show how often the Queen defied her husband to visit the " _Little Monster."_

Sandra closed her eyes and took a deep breath; they had been in Olympus for a little more than two weeks doing nothing. She might as well hunt down the " _Little Monster"_ and start his instruction in the Asgardian language.

\-----

At that moment, Remus was trying to hunt down the Queen of Olympus. He wanted to discuss Harry with her. They had been here for two weeks, and as it was summer holiday, Remus had spent the entire two weeks with Harry, but in two weeks would be the next full moon, and as a werewolf, Remus refused to infect anyone. He didn't know what would happen if he turned while in Olympus. He assumed that Sandra would look after Harry during the full moon, but Sandra refused! " _I am his bodyguard! I can't be watching for danger if I'm busy wiping his ass or busy giving him a bath."_

Remus couldn't understand why she couldn't do both, but he wasn't a trained bodyguard, so what did he know, he was training to be a history teacher and school counselor. He liked both but didn't know which one to choose, surprisingly it was Petunia who mentions that he should train for both " _more job opportunity,"_ she said.

_"Well, she wasn't wrong,"_ Remus thought. Entering the throne room, he stopped on the edge of the room and looked around. Zeus was hosting some sort of…trial…hearing…Remus wasn't sure what was going on. It looked like two Gods arguing over..." _was that a goat?"_ Remus thought.

"Enough!" Zeus roared. "It's a goat for Me's sake." Remus couldn't help it and snorted, Zeus looked over at him, "Even the mortal son of Fenrir agrees with me!" Zeus looked at both men long and hard. "If you can't agree with who owns the damn goat, then neither of you get to own it. Guards take the goat to the kitchen; it will become MY dinner tonight. Begone!" Zeus ordered the two men.

"Son of Fenrir, what grievance do you have for me today?" Zeus asked then took a drink of wine.

"Grievance? None, My Lord." Remus responded.

"Wonderful!" Zeus cried out happily, "Curia Deus is closed for this week, everyone begone! Son of Fenrir, why did you come?" Remus made his way closer to the throne as the Gods of Olympus, who apparently had a grievance for Zeus to settle left grumbling as they didn't get to be heard that day.

"My Latin is mainly used for spell work, but Curia Deus…Court of God?" Remus asked.

"God's Court," Zeus corrected, "similar to the medieval Baron's Court, where the serfs could make complaints, settle arguments, make payments to their liege lord."

"How come you don't follow a more…uhm…modern court system? I mean, we based our modern system on ancient Greece and Rome." Remus asked, embarrassed he might have offended the Greek God.

"HAHAHAHA!" Zeus laughed out, "There is nothing to be embarrassed about," Zeus said, noticing Remus's hesitation and pink cheeks. "I use this system because I have such a small population, like Asgard, there are only around 1,000-2,000 Olympians. I also am an absolute ruler who is prone to changing his mind. Like the goat, sometimes I give the rule of Solomon, which is what one of those men was hoping for. A free half-goat, well today, I had a headache, so he lost out, and I got a free goat dinner. I will probably invite the real owner and his family to dinner tonight and will compensate him for his goat I essentially stole."

"Would you like a headache draught?" Remus asked as he started to rummage in the messenger bag he always carried.

"Headache draught?" Zeus question…" APOLLO!" Zeus yelled out for the God of Healing, amongst other things.

Apollo stepped out of a portal, "yes, My Lord?"

"Have you ever tried a headache draught?" Zeus asked, waving his hand towards Remus. Remus handed the draught to Apollo, who opened the draught taking a sniff, then putting a finger over the hole he tipped it over, then tasted the small amount that was on his finger.

"I don't see anything wrong with it, would you like me to take it to see if it poisons me?" Apollo asked, and Remus just gasped at him in disbelief.

"If you have a headache, I can always go find a torpedo," Apollo said as he assessed Zeus.

"No, no, I would like to try the headache draught, it was offered in concern and good faith," Zeus stated, and Apollo handed him the draught.

"Torpedo?" Remus asked Apollo.

"A type of electric ray," Apollo replied.

"Huh…" Remus said as he just blinked in shock at the ancient form of healing the Olympians used. " _I would have thought they would be ahead of us in healing.'_ Remus thought.

"ME!" Zeus cried out in excitement, "It works!"

"Me?" Remus questioned; the more he got to know the different gods, the more confused he was getting.

"I've heard you exclaim, Merlin…others say, My God." Zeus started, "well, I am the King of the Gods, so I said ME!" Zeus laughed at Remus, blinking his eyes and putting his head in his hand while shaking it.

"You would probably get along with James and Sirius swimmingly." Remus laughed.

"James? Sirius?" Zeus questioned.

"James is the name Loki was going by when he was born to Charlus and Dorea Potter." Remus explained before sighing, "Sirius is our best friend, he was thrown in Azkaban for betraying James and Lily, even though he is innocent."

"Son of Fenrir, do you have more draughts? Do they cure other things?" Apollo asked as he was still investigating the headache draught.

"Oh yes, we…I mean the British Wizarding society, we have many potions that cure many ailments." Remus said quite proud of his Wizarding heritage. "Oh, and please, both of you call me Remus."

"So, Remus…" Zeus said, slowly getting used to the forename. "Why did you come seeking me out if you did not have a grievance?"

"I was actually looking for your Queen," Remus said

"Why?" Zeus asked suspiciously, and Apollo hid a laugh with a cough. Remus just blinked, confused at the suspicion.

"In two weeks is another full moon; I need to find someone to watch Harry. I asked Sandra, but she insisted she is a bodyguard, not a babysitter."

"Sandra?" Apollo asked.

"Sandraudiga, the Valkyrie," Remus responded.

"And she is quite correct!" Zeus declared. "She needs to have her concentration 100% on her surroundings, not have it split by caring for a child," Zeus said, and Apollo was nodding his head in agreement.

"Hera and I will watch the little one while you go romping as a wolf." Zeus declared to everyone's surprise.

"You will?" Remus asked.

"Of course, we will," Hera said as she entered the room, holding Harry and followed by Sandra.

"Harry, you are supposed to be napping." Remus moaned.

"We will also watch baby Harald when you are in school," Hera said as she sat down next to Zeus on her throne with Harry on her lap.

"As soon as you left, he crawled out of bed and began playing with his cat." Sandra tattled to Remus, giving him a look.

"What school?" Zeus question, "you are still young enough to be in school?"

"Yes, Remus is going to University to learn to be a teacher," Hera said to her husband.

"How old are you, Son of Fenrir…I mean, Remus?" Zeus asked.

"Remus just turned 24 in the month of Mars," Fenrir said as he stepped out of Hel's portal.

"And he is Grandson of Fenrir and mortal, so at age 24, he is an adult," Hel replied as she held her hands out for a squirming Harry. Who upon seeing his big brother and sister, he started to squeal in happiness, causing several adults to flinch because of the pitch.

"Oi! Why did you run to Hel first little man?" Fenrir pouted as Hel snuggled Harry, moving away from Fenrir each time he started to get close to take Harry away from Hel.

"Miss Hel," Harry said as he snuggled his sister. "Okay, see Fen now," Harry said, motioning to go to Fenrir.

"Ha!" Fenrir said to his sister as he picked up Harry. "Did you miss me too?"

"No," Harry said, causing all the adults to start laughing and Fenrir to pout again.

"No?!" Fenrir said as he tickled Harry. "How about now? Did you miss me?"

"No," Harry said, giggling and squirming from being tickled.

"No?!" Fenrir started to toss Harry in the air then catching him, causing Harry to squeal again. "How about now? Did you miss me?"

Harry promptly threw up in Fenrir's face causing all the adults to laugh and Remus to whip his wand out and catch Harry as Fenrir was busy throwing up himself. Harry was gently lowered to the floor, and he ran to hid behind Remus's leg. Remus using is wand cleaned the sick up and removed the smell, making it smell like lemons. Fenrir bends down, "Harald…Harry? Little man, I'm not mad; come here and see."

Harry peeked out from behind Remus's leg, "Sorry, Fen." Harry whispered, "I missed you too."

"Can I have a hug?" Fenrir asked, and Harry slowly came out and walked to Fenrir, who gave the baby a hug then picked him up. "I'm sorry I made you throw up."

"Do again?" Harry asked mischief.

"No," Fenrir said incredulous, not wanting to be thrown up on-again while all the adults laughed.

\-----

~ Thursday, September 1, 1983 ~

"Come on, Harry, it's time to wake up," Remus said as he sat on Harry's little bed, gently stroking Harry's hair. "Come on, little man, it's the first day of school for both you and me." Harry buried his head deeper into his pillow and blankets.

"Skogkatt, come help me wake Harry up," Remus said to the cat sleeping at the bottom of the bed.

Skogkatt came up to Harry and started to lick the little boy's hair, grooming it. The kitten, who was now as big as the little three-year-old boy, would send up a large, "MEOW," after every few licks.

Remus laughed, he couldn't believe the cat had actually listened to him. "Come on, Harry, wakey, wakey."

"Don't wanna," Harry mumbled.

"Come on little man," Remus said as he bent down and kissed Harry's forehead, today is the first day of school."

"School?" Harry said, interested in the word-school waking up slowly.

"Yes, remember you and I both have school today," Remus said, pulling the covers off a sleepy Harry and helping him to sit up.

Harry yawned big, "okay."

"Let's get you into the bath, so Queen Hera doesn't have a stinky Harry at the breakfast table."

"Not stinky, you stinky," Harry said, yawning.

"You are totally stinky," Remus teased, tickling Harry a little.

"No, you stinky McStink face," Harry said.

"Fenrir teach you that?" Remus asked, laughing.

"No, Uncle Ares," Harry said as Remus carried him to the bathroom.

"Wonderful, you're hanging out with the God of War when I'm not around," Remus deadpanned to himself, and Harry giggled.

\-----

"Ah, Remus, come in I have saved a spot for Harald and yourself next to me," Hera said as she sat to the left of Zeus, who was at the head of the table. Across from her on Zeus's right was Ares. Next to Ares was Heracles. Next to where Remus would be sitting, Athena sat, and at the other head of the table sat Poseidon.

Remus helped Harry into the booster seat next to Hera and sat down himself. Sandra slipped into the room and stood at attention against the wall behind Harry. "Busy breakfast table today," Remus said as he sat down and started to fill Harry's plate with fruit, eggs, and toast.

"Yes, I know you have met many of the Greek Gods, but not all, at the table is all the Gods that I have asked to help me teach Harald in the first couple years, others will join as he gets older."

"Yes, today, Harry told me that _Uncle_ Ares taught him to call people stinky McStink face," Remus said as he took a sip of his tea, Hera's eyes flashed dangerously as she looked to her son Ares as he and Heracles were laughing at the table. Zeus and Poseidon were holding their lips pressed tightly, trying not to join the younger gods in laughing, and Athena was like Remus hiding a smile behind a teacup. Behind Harry, Sandra snorted. Harry giggled at the adults acting silly while munching on a piece of fruit.

"So…" Hera said harshly before softening her voice as Harry jumped and looked at her questioningly, "Monday, Δευτέρα through Friday, Παρασκευή, Athena will teach Harald his letters in the English Alphabet, the Ancient Greek, and Modern Greek Alphabet. Sandraudiga, this would be a good time to teach Harry Asgardian language at the same time; over time, this will move from letters to grammar, then to reading and writing."

"Yes, Ma'am," Sandraudiga replied.

"After that, Harald will have lunch and a nap. Then on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday—Δευτέρα, Τετάρτη και Παρασκευή—after nap time, Harald will have physical education with Heracles. On Tuesday and Thursday—Τρίτη και Πέμπτη—Harald will have sword and weapon training with Ares."

"Isn't Harry too young for weapons training," Remus asked nervously.

"If he was a mortal or even a demi-god, yes, but Harald is a God, this is the perfect time to start teaching him." Ares responded, "don't worry, I will start out with wooden swords and poles before moving on to metal weapons."

"I'm not worried," Remus squeaked nervously, and all the Gods laughed.

"After physical education and weapons training, Harald will have another snack time and maybe a nap, but definitely a quiet time. He will then go with Athena to learn his numbers in English, Ancient Greek, Modern Greek, and Asgardian," Hera said before turning around to look at Sandraudiga, who nodded her acquiescence to teaching numbers too.

"On Saturday, Σάββατο, afternoon, I will take Harald and teach him how to swim," Poseidon said, cutting in excitingly, "and on Sunday, Κυριακή, I will teach him how to care for horses and how to ride a horse."

"Well, that all sounds wonderful and exciting. Hopefully, by the time Harry turns five, I will have graduated. I'm hoping to get a job teaching in Athens and can enroll Harry in a school there, so he is around children his own age." Remus stated as he finished up his breakfast. Checking his watch, he turns to Harry, "Hey little man, it's time for me to leave for school, you have a good day. Come here and give me a hug."

"Okay, Mumy," Harry cheekily replied.

"Mumy? You mean Moony." Remus said, confused, being careful to pronounce Moony for three-year-old Harry.

"Nope." Mumy." Harry giggled, and Remus looked at him in confusion.

"Well, you to act as his parental figure," Hera said, fighting the giggles herself.

"Well, yes, but I thought if he was going to call me anything, it would be Daddy, not Mumy," Remus replied as he picked Harry up and raspberries his cheek before giving him a hug goodbye.

"No, Dadfoot, Mumy!" Harry replied as he sat back down and slurped some eggs off his plate by putting his mouth on the plate.

"Manners Harry James Potter!" Remus scolded as he picks up his book bag completely missing Harry mentioning Padfoot. Harry just pointed to Ares, who was laughing so hard he fell out of his chair. Hera stood up and peered over the edge of the table at her son, rolling on the floor laughing.

Hera shoots Zeus a dirty look, "he is so your son!" she snarls, "Ares, Son of Zeus get off the floor and stop teaching Harald bad manners!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had hoped to have more chapters completed before I started posting but then Grammarly sent me an email saying I haven't edited anything in a week. Oops! So here is the first chapter, I hope to have the second chapter out next week...after I finished editing it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: § symbol is used to show parseltongue.

“FOUR!” Odin called out as he took a swing of his golf club. He had been invited to Midgard to play golf with the three Olympian Kings, a boy’s day out. The four Kings even had the pleasure of some beautiful meadow Dryads as caddies. While on Midgard, he had a little surprise for Loki’s youngest, one he hoped the boy wouldn’t survive from.

“I really enjoyed watching the Wild Hunt that your grandson Fenrir hosted!” Zeus needled Odin.

“I missed it,” Poseidon moaned. “I really need to promote one of my people to Seer, but none seem to show a talent for it. Not since Ursula died.”

“I participated and thoroughly enjoyed myself. Good job, please let Fenrir know,” Hades responded, knowing full well that Fenrir and Odin did not speak.

Odin ground his teeth together, smiling with a false promise to speak to Fenrir taking a swing he completely fouled, and his ball wound up in the golf courses lake.

“Here, let me get that for you,” Poseidon said with a chuckle and a wave of his finger Zeus’s ball, and all the other balls in the lake came out and rested on the shore. “Oops, sorry about that!” The two other Olympians tried to hold their chuckles in…unsuccessfully with the dirty look, Odin sent their way.

“I must say,” Zeus continued, “you definitely have bigger balls than I do.”

“Oh?” Odin questioned.

“Yes, has your wife figured out you bewitched her and your children?” Zeus asked, and Odin spewed water that he had just taken a drink of all over the golf course.

“What did you say?” Odin postured dangerously but backed down when Hades and Poseidon stepped behind their little brother in support.

“Heimdall may have stopped the viewing of the Wild Hunt after Loki’s sister-in-law blew her husband away, but we and…I believe the rest of the nine realms continued to watch as Loki took what’s her name…” Zeus snapped his finger, turning his head slightly towards Hades, still keeping his eye on Odin.

“Petunia,” Hades supplied, knowing full well that Zeus knew her name.

“Right…Petunia, as Loki and Thor took Petunia home, we watched as Frigga gave Harald to Hera to care for, Hera was in the other room when you arrived packing Harald’s things, she threw up an illusion and shield and watched as your grandchildren threatened Ragnarök. Did you know Harald is living with us in Olympus? He calls Hera, ya-ya, which is Greek for grandmother. He has also started to call me papoo…”

“Have fun playing grandfather to the Little Monster!” Odin snarled as he walked over to the four Dryads taking his golf bag violently from one of the ladies, “And I mean that literally, I don’t know how he has tricked everyone, but he will be the death of Olympus. I won’t have him be the death of Asgard!” As Odin walked away, he magicked a shrunken, Asgardian Huggorm, into Zeus’s golf bag. “Heimdall, bring me home!” Odin ordered before stepping into the Rainbow Bridge.

The three Olympian brothers chuckled. “I wonder what he meant?” Hades asked, and the other two shrugged. “Thanatos, attend me,” Hades ordered, and the winged personation of death appeared.

“Yes, My Lord?” Thanatos questioned.

“Find the Norse Goddess of Death and ask her if she has a moment to answer a question for me.” Hades orders as he took his shot.

“Lord Hades, you wished to speak to me?” Hel asked, not even a full minute after Thanatos had disappeared.

“That was quick,” Zeus said, blinking at Hel.

“I was in the neighborhood,” Hel responded, and behind her, in the distance, the three Gods noticed a small commotion as one of the golf course’s patrons had died.

“Do you always collect souls yourself, instead of sending your Grim Reapers?” Hades asked.

“When they are rude and insulting? Yes.” Hel stated firmly, “plus that inbred piece of trash is a Midgardian British Seidrmenn who believes and worships the Norse Gods.” Hel sighed, “and, I was tired of him insulting my mortal descendants, the Potters, someone cursed the last of their line, and I am investigating it.”

“Was it him?” Poseidon asked as he teed up.

“No,” Hel replied, then turned to Hades, “what did you need to ask me?”

“Why is Odin so insistent that Harald is a monster?” Hades asked as he pushed Poseidon out of the way and set up his own golf ball.

“Because the Midgardian Seidrmenn who killed Loki’s Midgardian Seidr wife left a piece of his soul behind in a cut on Harald’s forehead. Odin appeared shortly after Harald was left on his aunt’s doorstep and felt the malevolence from that soul piece.” Hel said, and all three men stood and stared with their mouths gaping. Hades had swung, but the ball had bounced only a couple of feet.

“He did what?” Hades asked as he straightened up and looked at Hel.

“He is…unfortunately…one of my descendants, one driven mad by inbreeding and growing up in an orphanage during the London Blitz. He wants to be immortal, so he found Herpo the Foul’s book on how to make Horcruxes.” Hel said as she pulled the crystal that held the Horcrux that was in Harry out of an invisible bag at her waist.

“Herpo…I remember him, a Mageia, second-generation demi-god, his father was a son of Hecate, and his mother was a Lamia. He was always going to live longer than normal.” Hades said, shaking his head as he examined the crystal. “This was in Harald?”

“Yes, Frigga had me move the soul out of Harald into this crystal,” Hel responded as the other Gods crowded around and examine the crystal. “There are six others that I need to track down. Grandmother said Jormungandr can destroy the pieces.”

“Hmmm…that or cursed fire,” Hades said then handed the crystal back to Hel.

“Would you…” Hel paused, unsure of what she was asking, showing the teenager that she was, only when Hades raised an eyebrow at her did, she continue, “would you take his soul to Tartarus when it is entirely destroyed. I don’t want him in Nifheimr. He doesn’t deserve to be there with the rest of his ancestors. If you were going to bloody eagle anyone, he would deserve it.”

“Heard that, did you?” Hades asked with a laugh. Hel just cocked her eyebrow at him before she stepped into a portal and disappeared.

\-----

“Heimdall,” Odin said as he landed on the Rainbow Bridge, “can you see into Olympus? The Little Monster is living with Zeus and Hera in Olympus.”

“I can, My Lord,” Heimdall said hesitantly, “but the moment I look, the Titaness Theia will be alerted and will alert Zeus of my spying. It’s the same if she were to look into Asgard; I would immediately know and let you know.”

“Damn!” Odin swore as he paced in the room. Heimdall watching his lord nervously.

“There is always someone on Midgard…” Odin murmured, talking to himself, “Heimdall, who do we have on Midgard right now?”

“Hödr and Baldr are both on Midgard right now in the American Southwest, learning to…hang glide,” Heimdall said nervously. “I am keeping an eye on them and will pull them out if anything dangerous should happen.”

“My blind son Hödr is hang gliding with my…retard son Baldr?” Odin asked dangerously. “Now, all we need is my deaf son to join them. How is it Loki is my only non-disabled son?”

“That word is not used anymore…the correct word is ‘on the Autistic spectrum,’” Heimdall corrected.

“I don’t care.” Odin said, “it’s the blind leading the blind.”

“They are both highly military-trained Gods.” Heimdall reminded Odin.

“They are useless for what I need, who else is on Midgard?” Odin snapped.

“Hel, Fenrir, Jörmungandr…” Heimdall started listing those Asgardians on Midgard.

“They don’t count!” Odin roared, “who else?”

“Lady Sif has a contingent of Shieldmaidens and Valkyrie on Vanaheim,” Heimdall said as he keeps searching for those, off-world. “Thor and the Warriors Three are hunting…”

“I don’t care, who else?” Odin interrupted, getting frustrated.

“Sandraudiga is on Olympus. The Titaness also just informed Zeus that I looked into Olympus. Sorry my Lord.” Heimdall said, worried about the young Valkyrie.

“Contact Sandraudiga and inform her she is to return home immediately. When she gets here, send her into my throne room.” Odin said, walking away. _‘Sandraudiga?”_ Odin thought as he walked away, _“Why do I know that name…ah, a young inexperienced Valkyrie that I fucked against the wall once after a battle.”_ “Hmmm…” Odin said out loud. _“She has always been respectful and given me doe eyes without becoming clingy afterward.”_ Odin thought as he skimmed over his other conquests over the years, including a wife or two.

\-----

Sandraudiga stepped into Zeus’s throne room while he was playing with the Little Monster. He had just gotten back from golfing with his brothers and Odin and was sharing the temper tantrum that Odin had with the room full of Greek Gods. She frowned before adjusting herself to a neutral look and approaching the throne, “Lord Zeus.”

“Ah, Valkyrie, my Aunt Theia said your God of Sight was looking into Olympus,” Zeus said, eyeing the Asgardian, and the room became instantly quiet.

“Yes, I am being recalled home to speak with My Lord,” Sandraudiga said nervously.

“Then, swift travels,” Hera replied, coming into the room, walking beside the Greek Queen was the Asgardian Goddess of Death.

“Sandraudiga, do remember who you truly serve,” Hel said as she walked up to the Valkyrie. “Queen Frigga may have given you the order to be Prince Harald’s bodyguard, but it was with my blessing that you continue. Odin may call you to him, but you are MY subject, not his.”

“My Queen,” Sandraudiga said as she bowed to Hel and turned to leave. She could hear the Little Monster squealing as he ran into his sister’s arms.

\-----

Odin’s golf bag had been deposited in his private rooms, as a tiny poisonous viper slipped out of the golf bag, it grew until it was no longer small but 6 feet long and 2 feet wide and growing more. As it slithers out of the room in search of the prey, it had been compelled to attack it kept growing. **§Ah,§** the viper thought, **§here is the nest of the one the one-eye required me to attack and kill. I’ll just rest here till it returns to hibernate.§** The now 12 feet long and 3 feet wide viper slithered under the warm toddler bed and curled up to patiently await its prey.

“Come on, Harald, time for a nap,” Hera said as she picked up the yawning toddler. Hera carried a sleepy Harry into his room and tucked him in singing him a little song to help him sleep. Bending over, she kissed his forehead and tucked the drowsy toddler in. “Come, Skogkatt, let your boy sleep without becoming distracted by the thoughts of play,” Hera called out to the giant kitten who kept trying to investigate under the bed, at the insistence of the Queen he followed her out of the room as she closed the door.

Sitting down in the sitting room outside Harry’s nursery Hera pulled a new book out of her pocket, The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty by A.N. Roquelaure. The book was the most erotic, raunchiest thing she had ever read, she most definitely didn’t read this where others could see her, as a Queen she had a reputation to uphold. Fanning herself with the book, she had just read something she didn’t know was even possible; she heard a noise from Harry’s room. Putting the book down, she got up to tuck Harry back in or soothe him if he was having a nightmare, she had forgotten to grab the monitoring crystal, opening the door Hera screamed in fear, “HERACULES!”

\-----

Harry was asleep when he suddenly felt like he was being hugged. Liking hugs, Harry tried to hug whoever was hugging him back, but for some reason, he couldn’t move his arms. **§Oh, so small and tasty. I wish I could eat you, but the one eye said only to bite. To poison. To kill,§** the viper said as he looped himself around the sleeping toddler.

 **§You can’t kill me,§** Harry said, opening his eyes, widening as he took in the snake.

 **§Oh, I most certainly can, Little Morsel,§** the viper said as he reared his head in a striking pose.

“HERACULES!” Hera screamed in fear at the open door to Harry’s nursery.

The viper hissed, rearing his head away from Harry to look at the Goddess, screaming in the doorway. **§Stay away! This morsel is mine!§**

\-----

“You wished to see me, Your Majesty?” Sandraudiga purred to Odin as he waved her over, pulling her onto his lap while on the throne.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not follow Odin's bigoted train of thought. In the real myths of Asgard, Odin's son Hödr was blind.

**Author's Note:**

> Please, please review and tell me what you think!


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